keskiviikko, marraskuu 19, 2008

I still keep copying

Hi!
Copying keeps going. I am on page 115, and the book is still "Banker".

Tunnisteet:

maanantai, syyskuu 29, 2008

More copying

Hi!
I may have told you I copy a book. Oh yes. The Banker. That's the name of it. I copy it to understand the plot and the structure things. The page I am on...its number is 70. Let's hope I get further in the future.

perjantai, syyskuu 12, 2008

Copying goes on

Hi!
I still keep copying. It feels like...it is the only way to understand the structure of a story. Soundsd odd, I know. But that is the way it is. If you want to know why, I'd give you one advice. Think of the painters of the old times. Their apprentices...they did the same to understand how to paint and such. That is what I am trying to do with my writing.

I am still copying that Banker - book. And the page is 69 for now.

Tunnisteet:

tiistai, syyskuu 09, 2008

Copying goes on

Hi!
I keep copying. The reason is I want to understand what to put in and what to leave out. The book I am copying is called "Banker".

maanantai, kesäkuu 30, 2008

Operation Aorta, part 1

Operation Aorta
Chapter 1
Version 2

Here I am now, lying in bed. This place is the upstairs of the Bearditch House. I don't know what is going on, but I know I can't think but one person. One blonde woman with brown eyes and the most stunning smile I have ever seen. Who is she? Where is she from? How did she get in and why? There are no answers, only questions. I close my eyelids and let my thoughts wander back to the discussion I had with Irina earlier that day. We were in Irina’s car and Irina was driving us from the airport to the Bearditch House.
"Are you tired?"
“Not much.”
"The Bearditch House won't be far anymore. Then you can rest. I believe Auntie Anita has....Oh no!"
“Tell me!”
"I did not tell them about your arrival! Auntie Anita will kill me for this! What are we going to do now?"
"Oh come on, Irina! Your Auntie Anita can't be that bad!"
"You do not know my relatives, Raul....wait a minute! Or...is it a good idea after all...?"
"Just tell me already what you are up to!"
“All right, if you insist that. We could call to the Bearditch House and let them know there is one extra guest coming. There is space for three guests, so if there is no one except you, me, Auntie Anita and Uncle Juan, we should fit in perfectly."
"That sounds like a plan."


I grab a pen and some paper I have with me. I write some words on paper. After that I fold the paper and drop it in. Then I lick the glue and close the envelope's flap. I leave the letter on the table. I try to guess the name of my mysterious nightly guest, but I can’t guess what her name could be. I decide to call her as “Helen” untill she will tell me her name. I add the name on the envelope, put myself back to bed and close my eyes. The mysterious woman won't come back tonight. I don't know how I know it, but I do.
I change my position every so slightly and turn my thoughts back to the events of the day. We all were in the large kitchen. I can still remember Anita’s words she said during the evening tea.
“You can stay one week here with us. I do not know how long Irina is going to stay, but she is a relative.”
“Thank you. I feel honored I can stay that long.”
Next morning I wake up when Anita walks upstairs and calls my name from the stairs. I open my eyes and look at her. She is maternally roundish woman and probably in her late forties. She has a permanent silver willow's leaves’ color in her hair, and I could be interested about her if she was not married.
"It's time to eat breakfast," Anita says. I look to the direction of the table. The envelope is still there, and the name “Helen” is clearly in sight.
"I'll be right there," I answer. I rise and pull my pants on. Then I go down the stairs. After I have visited outside to do the things everyone usually do in the morning, I turn on my heels and go back in. I am glad Juan and Anita let me stay. I tried to prepare myself last night to the worst scenario. If that would have happened, I could have been only one evening with Irina and maybe even read some of her writing. But now I am allowed to stay a little bit longer. How did Irina manage to convince her Auntie and Uncle of my harmlessness? Only she herself knows the answer. But on the other hand I don’t even care. All I care about right now is the fact I am here. And I am allowed to stay here at least one week.
"Good morning, Raul." That is Irina's voice. Irina Silver is Juan's and Anita's niece, and I am Irina's beta reader. My name is Raul Lane. This is the first time Irina and I have met face to face. Irina has her summer vacation now, and I have all the time in the world in my hands, because I am on pension. My coming here was all Irina's idea, so she invited me. This place, Bearditch House, is Irina’s late paternal grandparents’ home. Irina’s father was born in here. Irina and I exchanged many emails, untill we got the details all worked out – between us. But no one is perfect. The same mistake Irina did with informing her Auntie and Uncle, could have happened to me. I could as well have forgotten to tell Norma that there will be one extra guest in the house for a week.
"Good morning. Mm...What is this delicious smell?" I sniff the air.
"It's Auntie Anita's porridge. I'm crazy about it." I can hear the smile in Irina's voice. She must like her Auntie's cooking.
"Did you sleep well?" Now the speaker is Juan Hunt, Irina's uncle and Anita's husband. He and his wife are about the same age, I guess. Juan's hair, moustache and beard are all gray.
"Yes, thank you." I don't know if I should tell them about "Helen" or not. I decide to stay silent. None of them has probably met "Helen", so they may think I am crazy and I must give them a good first impression. I may even get invitation to come for another visit – or lengthen this one. And it may be that "Helen" is just a vision only I can see. Oh how much I miss her even now! But I have to keep my head cool and be patient. I know for sure the sunset will bring “Helen” back to me – even for one moment only.
"OK everyone, just take some porridge before it gets cold", Anita's voice returns me back to reality.
I take one helping and carry my plate carefully back to the table. I am not that hungry on mornings, but I must eat so I would not make Juan or Anita suspicious. Irina’s words from the previous night keep ringing in my ears. "You may have to take a flight home tomorrow morning or even tonight.”
Oh “Helen”, if only you were here! I'd have so much to say to you...so many questions to ask of you...but maybe you are just a dream...a beautiful dream of which I'll awake.
Once my plate is empty, I carry it to the washing table in the other end of the kitchen, near the stove. On my way out I pass by the White Room, which is the festivity room, and the Green Room, which is the master bedroom. Between the White Room and the Green Room there is only one wall – which has a door too. It means one can go from the Green Room straight to the White Room, but to get out of either of the rooms one must go through the kitchen.
"Thanks for porridge, now I must go out. Irina, where did you put that folder of yours?"
"Oh, that. Just look for the swing." Irina puts her head back down and keeps eating her porridge. I put my shoes on and rush outside. Now I know for sure I can concentrate on Irina’s writing. The time between our arrival and the evening tea that same night…that was terrible! I hate uncertainty in my life. But now there’s nothing between me and Irina’s writing.
I take my pen from my pocket and open the blue folder. I mark a spot here, another there. Few hours go by before I can even realize.
When I have reached the end of the first chapter of Irina’s writing, I hear a cowbell ringing behind me. I close the folder, leave it behind me and step down from the swing.
“It is time to eat lunch!” Anita’s strong voice says. Suddenly I feel hungry. I wash my hands in the rain water barrel and head inside.
“What have you cooked, Auntie?” Irina asks as soon as we have seated.
“Just smashed potatoes”, Anita replies.
I decide to take only one helping, just like in the morning. But I have hardly taken my helping and carried it back to the table, when someone knocks on the door between the porch and the kitchen. Anita answers the door and the guest behind it steps over the threshold. When my eyes catch her face, I almost drop my fork. I just can’t believe my eyes! The timing is all wrong…and still I know for sure I recognize her. I swallow hastily and put my fork on my plate. I don’t want her to see how badly my hands shake. Joy and nervousness fill my heart at the same time. The woman on the door is my nightly guest, “Helen”.

TBC

perjantai, kesäkuu 06, 2008

Just some...writing

Hi!
I have been thinking.

What if I would write a list of promises each chapter must redeem? Then my readers would be able to tell me if I wrote what I promised to write.

Tunnisteet:

lauantai, syyskuu 22, 2007

What is going on?

Hello everyone!
Where should I start? Well, maybe from the beginning. During the summer -07 I was sitting on my backyard. I had a little, radio-kind of item with me. I used it to listen a book from the tape. The book told about a boy. He tried to get a girlfriend. But he tried in wrong way. He was blind to that fact. He kept going from the breakup to the breakup untill he realized something. He understood he was good as he was. He did not need to pretend being something he simply was not. After the MC realized this he found a girlfriend.
While I was listening I thought that the MC was incredibly stupid. I was able to see all the time he tried the wrong way. I was angry for him. Why could not he just be himself? Why did he try to be something he simply could not be? I was relieved in the end when the MC realized he was good just the way he was.
After that book...I got a writer's block. I simply could not write a word for a long time. Recently the desire to write has come back. I do not want to write anything new, though. I want only copy the text of magazines and save them. I am never going to show them. I do it because I want to keep the connection. I do not want to forget my writer self.
Last night I began a detective story. While I listend, I felt questions going through my head. The questions were like these: "What does he find from the attic? Why was his smile unkind? Who is the woman hiding and spying on him?" I have not found the answers yet but I believe all this has something to do with my writing. I believe I am on the lesson.
As I earlier wrote, I can't produce anything my own right now. I just copy magazine articles. But something has happened to me. In the past I copied just words. I did not care about them. I did not care about the style. Now I do. For example, the describing parts of the article...they...pop out on me. Or something like that. I mean...that is like...my creative self would poke me from within and say "That is the way you are meant to write. That part is well written.".

Oh well...I just hope my desire to write something my own will be back soon. Untill then I keep copying.